29 June 2020

Evening Prayers for the fun of it

 Evening Prayer Brunswick Heads, 
25 June 2020, oil on canvas board,
 30 X 25 cm

"Cash burn is not necessarily a bad thing, if the money is being invested in a way that will lead to future growth and profit."

I read this one day a few years back in an article in the Investing section of The New York Times. At that time I was in a period of great worry that I was going through all my savings. I have always had enough to just slip by in my life, but after a few poor financial choices over the years I began to see the bottom of the proverbial barrel. I also remembered what Hemingway once said, or wrote, that "going broke happens slowly at first, then quickly". I used to recount this to friends when discussing money problems but I almost always recounted it with a nervous fear of its irony. 

Around this time I was just beginning this series of paintings done at the edge of the Pacific Ocean here in Australia. It has turned into a series, a long-winded one perhaps, but after three years it almost feels like I have been writing a book. A long book, a steady one, and one which has silenced my impatience and fear of failure.

Like a diary the studies are done most everyday, and indeed I have come to see them as paragraphs in a long autobiography. A painter   who writes might say: "these are endless waves arriving on the shore". 

Just as my confidence has grown in Painting so have my worries about money lessened. Painting is an investment in future growth. It is a byproduct of believing in one's worth, in this case cultural, but hopefully fiscal too. If it's a pipe dream, so be it. 

If it is of value I will eventually be compensated. If not, then I will have at least enjoyed myself here on earth. I just have to have enough to keep going, and all will be good. 

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