questions

I wonder if its possible to access something deep inside of me in order to answer crucial questions about what I am after in my Painting. I seemed to have left a familiar path, one to which I had adhered during my early years in working.

I left the 'motif' which had anchored me to a visible pathway and its now more than ten years that I have been wrestling with myself in front of a blank canvas without the markings of a world visible in front of my eyes.

So the question one asks is "What am I after?"
What is it I am trying to do?

I can see over the last few years that I am after a kind of poetic, almost ephemeral feeling somewhat balanced between flight and pose. But isn't this every painter's dream in fact? I wonder if what really obsesses me isn't just a desperate attempt at understanding myself.

The following painting was done last fall before leaving for Australia. I had planned to work on it upon my return but seeing it on the wall (via SKYPE) a few friends have remarked that it was quite interesting "as is".

Perhaps I shall leave it "as is" for the moment. Maybe I need an editor to take work away from me before I destroy it or fall into a never-ending funnel of un-finish. 

And this (below) is the evolution of new painting done today.